So. Hey guys, it’s been a hot sec since I last checked in, which is sort of like me but I thought I was on a roll with changing that lately.. oops.
This year is absolutely soaring past and taking no prisoners as it goes. I want to write a slightly different post this evening as inspiration has been slim to none of late, and as much as I want to write every day and make something of the time I have, it’s beginning to feel like an uphill battle.
At the end of January, I left my full-time job in London as a Security Supervisor, a position that had begun to take its toll on me, in mind, health and spirit, it was all too much living away, working what felt like 24hrs a day and not in an industry that I was passionate about. So, I did what was best for me, handed in my notice and made steps for the next supervisor to hopefully have a simpler time than I had. Then I moved back home to Cornwall.
Coming back to Cornwall was the most relieving, elevating, and inspirationally uplifting move I could have made. Suddenly I was sleeping more than 4 hours a night- uninterrupted! I could exercise, eat better, actually see the day, get fresh air, and most importantly I could spend quality time with my loved ones without having the obligation to answer my phone in the first ring every 5 minutes. This was the life.
This was also 3 months ago. Now, rather than being under the banner of “figuring out my next move” or “just left my last job”, I have to admit that the flag flying at this camp reads “unemployed” or, “funemployed” as I would rather refer to it as, because don’t get me wrong, I’m having a blast, free as a bird, and making plans day by day according to the Cornish weather forecast. However, to continue to enjoy a lifestyle of “hey, let’s go for food and a movie anytime we fancy” I need to get my ass back to a place of earning. Which I would be more than happy to do if anyone would answer my emails regarding work.
Here are the facts when it comes to looking for work in your early 20s, in Cornwall.
To begin with, you must understand and accept that Cornwall doesn’t pay like London does. Ok, that’s manageable, the difference is made up by the quality of life that you are rewarded with here.
Secondly, If you don’t yet drive, you must be willing to walk 10000 miles, get the train, get the bus, do what it takes. Because beggars can’t be choosers and as much as I would love to stay at home and work from here, I have to actually go out and get said work first.
Another hurdle I’m learning not to take too personally is the rejection. The flat out disregard to even answer my emails with a “sorry, no”. From the 20 something applications I’ve sent, I’ve had 1 email back to say that the company aren’t hiring. Which is expected as most of the companies I’ve approached haven’t sent out anything to make the public aware of a vacant position, it’s just been me trying to put my name forward and get my little feet in the door.
It’s an uphill battle. It’s becoming more and more discouraging. I feel like I have applied for every company in the industry in my town and the next one over but to no avail. I’m so keen to get to work again that I’ve applied for full time, part time, apprenticeships, internships, the lot. Now what?
Persistence is what now. Persistence and patience. What more can be done but to keep on keeping on. I’ve been told that the next thing to do is to summon up some real-life courage and physically go to the offices of the places I’m applying to, to make an impression. The following is my thought process on that:
Do I really have to? Rejection can’t be any better face to face.
What version of me should they meet upon the first impression? Do I go I super professional and add a dash of my managerial “I can handle anything” tone, or do I go in as my authentic self, be friendly, professional, and then cry when they tell me to go away? I would always, always advise authenticity in every situation, to be real is, to be honest and honesty is the best policy, no? The only downside is the crying may also be very real and honest with a hint of begging.
I’ve decided as right now, as I’m writing this, that I’m not going to allow the anxiety that’s been eating away at me for the past few weeks about not being good enough, feeling embarrassed at my lack of work/career, feeling like a child that needs to be taken care of, rather than a woman who does have the means to take care of herself, and to grab this time by the balls and embrace how lucky I am to be able to go to a spin class 2 mid-mornings a week without having to take an early lunch break to make it there. It’s a crippling feeling on my soul to not be able to summon happiness lately. I’m a fun person, a loving person, a woman with drive and ambition, thankfully I am also the type of woman to take the rockier road less travelled as opposed to the main road with everyone else.
If you’re in a position like I am, one that feels like you’ve been treading water and now your legs are getting tired, just lie back, float, and breath. You can still get somewhere by floating, it may take a little longer than a determined front crawl, but don’t stress and cause yourself worry and anxiety. There is a shoreline nearby, and you will reach it.